Course and Author Details

This e-course offers insights from a certified couples counsellor into singleness and dating. It is a five session course with multiple short videos per session. It is meant to watch at home, or with a smaller or larger group in your community or church setting. There are questions to discuss and exercises to try.

There is nothing wrong with singleness! It's just that we know from research that the majority of singles, especially under 45, in the long term want to be in a relationship. So this is a course for anyone who is single and longs for a long-term relationship. And for those who know and love someone single and want to support them in their journey, whether as a therapist, as a pastor or counsellor or just as a friend. It is not for those who want to stay single. (see the upcoming course from the Deep and Wide Academy on Surviving Christianity Unmarried: A Theology of Singleness That Isn't Looking For Its Cure.)

Aukelien van Abbema is an ICEEFT registered EFT couples counsellor and she works as a clinical psychologist in the Netherlands, in mental health care. She specializes in dating and relationship formation. She has written her first book Single in Church in 2011 and her second book Dare to Date in 2013. She has been a speaker and numerous conferences, churches and therapist groups in various places all over the world.

The Relationship Guide for Single People Book

Along with the course, the Relationship Guide for Single people is a book that can be used as a course manual. In the book you will find additional questions, deeper dives into various topics and useful information to deepen your understanding of the topic of dating and relationships.

Praise for the book:
Aukelien van Abbema vividly describes the doubts and fears of singles. Dating is exciting and necessary to eventually get into a (lasting) relationship. She looks at it all from the perspective of attachment theory and that gives support and hope! An uplifting and realistic book in which you will recognize a lot!

– Karin Wagenaar, accredited EFT trainer, supervisor, therapist and chair of the EFT Netherlands Foundation

This book does something special. It tells and "relates" the knowledge from the world of couples therapy and brings it to those seeking a long-term, mature love relationship. The author candidly uses her own experiences to welcome the lifestyles of singles. A hopeful and encouraging book for anyone on their way to finding a life partner.

- Jef Slootmaeckers, accredited EFT trainer, supervisor, therapist. Director EFT-Belgium

What a wonderful book. I enjoyed it immensely and I think and hope many more people will enjoy it very much. It is well and smoothly written. Here-and-there a more than wonderful articulation of EFT. Highly recommended!

– Peter Verboom, GZ psychologist and EFT couples therapist

Aukelien has a smooth pen! She succeeds in bringing difficult and complex themes in a light-hearted and understandable way and takes the reader along in a way in which the things she sees so clearly are also conveyed that way. In the combination of her personal experiences and her insights from various therapy streams, Aukelien processes everything into a beautiful whole, which will no doubt help many people.

– Catherine Vanthemsche, clinical psychologist, EFT singles therapist and trainer